• Sleepy Doormouse - My Story

    At first my life was going so well, I had lots of friends went out all the time, was the last to leave the party exactly how a teenager should be. Then glandular fever came along, but as a head strong teenager I decided I didn't need to take it easy and went about my life with little interruption. Then as time went on I began to feel worse and realised that I was not getting over this illness. I couldn't go out anymore I felt lonely and ill.

    Many visits to the doctors followed, I was told more times than I care to remember that I was depressed, and any illness I had was in my head. After a change of GP I was referred to a specialist. I had no idea what kind of a specialist I was going to and to be honest I didn't care. I remember his first words to my mum after he had examined me "You will be relieved to know it is not MS". MS I didn't even know that was a possibility. He went on to explain that I had ME, at last a name for this illness.

    Then came the down side, he told me he could not do anything to cure me, but he recommended that I stay off work for six months to try and get my life back! So for six months I stayed in bed all day so that I was able to see my boyfriend at night and keep one foot in the real world. It did seem to do the trick and I got better to a point although I knew I was not cured.

    I got married and life was good. Well for a while anyway. I still had more illness than most people and nearly lost my job, but had a medical and it was confirmed I had ME and that should be taken into account when considering any disciplinary action. So I carried on working, and after four years of marriage became pregnant with my daughter (who is now 5). I do not get on with pregnancy was sick every day, but from an ME point of view I felt fantastic. I gave birth to Rebecca and loved being a Mum.

    Life was good, and then as Rebecca turned 1 I became pregnant again with my son (now 3). Again I was very sick but ME wise great. I gave birth to Michael, but I suffered really badly with post natal depression, which awoke my ME. This was hard I had ME and 2 children, but somehow I coped. I was coping very well until 2 years ago when I started getting very bad abdominal pain. Ended up being admitted to hospital were I stayed for 7 weeks (don't know how I stayed sane but somehow I did). Eventually I was told I had a faulty bile duct so would have to have my gall bladder removed, but would have to have open surgery.

    All of the time I was in hospital I felt great well apart from abdominal pain, probably to do with resting all day every day. The doctors told me it would take about 6 weeks to recover, so I spent more time at home resting, whilst my wonderful family looked after my children. So we got to six weeks post op, then 7 then 8 then 3 months, and I was feeling worse, I was not getting better. I had pains everywhere (something I had never had before) I felt tired confused and upset. My GP referred me back to the specialist, who confirmed that my ME had come back but worse than before.

    So since then I have been taking one day at a time. I have tried most methods of treatment, and I am always open to any new ideas. I have lost so many friends during my illness, well actually they probably were never friends! I generally pretend to people I have nothing wrong with me which is a bit tricky when I am having to use my walking stick. I do this because I find that easier than explaining, and seeing the panic in peoples eyes and then watching them avoid me.

    I still stay positive that one day this illness will no longer be a part of my life, but I would be lying if I did not say I still have some very down days. Well that is my story, but that is not the end, I hope and pray one day I will be able to write the final chapter all about how I got better and all the wonderful things I was able to do.