• Dragonlady1380 - Living With M.E

    My life was finally going great, I was at college during the day studying biomedical sciences in order to fulfil my dream career in forensics I had only two more years left to go. I also had a part time job in a call centre and I was doing well at that too. My days consisted of getting up and leaving my two bedrooms flat at 8am and going to college then straight to work afterwards. Then when I got home about 8.30pm i'd get changed and go for a run. On Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays I would also go out with friends. Life was going good. I'd recently given up on finding Mr. Right as they all turned out to be Mr. Wrong. Then on the 12th of February 2006 I walked into work and was greeted by a big smile and a hello from a guy at the next desk, i'd seen him around the place but that was it.

    All night he was smiling at me and making chit chat. The next day he gave me his number amd it turned out that he lived around the corner from me. On the 14th of February I invited him round for a drink but he said he was busy as it was his mate's birthday. He ended up calling round and we talked into the night. When it was time for him to leave we kissed and I felt that spark. We were an item. When I returned to work the next day there was a note on my desk for me and that began our little note passing escapade.

    We had so much in common. Both had dragon tattoos and liked bikes. It turned out we both started at work on the same day just that he was on the day shift and I was on the late shift. We knew a lot of the same people but had never met. The first time he stayed over was just perfect but as I was going to college I had to kick him out in the morning but he didn't mind. He was always back after work and pretty much never left. Tom moved in and we got a dog, a German shepherd named Memphis life was perfect. Then in May he got sick and gave me the virus so we were both off work and college for two weeks I returned feeling drained but better than two weeks later as on June the 10th I got out of bed and my right leg gave way.

    I've always had problems with my knees giving way but it only lasted a short while. A week later I was still unable to put any weight on my leg and I hobbled into the kitchen and my left leg went too. That was me unable to walk. I was back and forth to the doctors and hospital where they told me they couldn't find anything wrong. By now I couldn't feel my legs or move them. I was so scared i'd never walk again. Through it all Tom was by my side and was my 6'5" tower of strength. I had a MRI, x-rays and many other tests but they all revealed nothing. I then began having other problems like breathing difficulties, headaches, anaphylactic reactions and I still don't know what to.

    Christmas was coming up and I thought what the hell, I bought an engagement ring for Tom and proposed on Christmas eve, he said yes totally surprised. In January I was taken into Glasgow southern general hospital for two weeks to undergo more tests to find out what was wrong. Nine days later I took three steps and was so happy. I called Tom to tell him but couldn't get hold of him. After four hours I called my friend who lived round the corner to go and check on him. She told me that the back door was wide open and that the dog was in the yard and his phone was on the bed. She also told me that the furniture had been moved around. I asked her to take care of the dog and house and I called the hospital but he wasn't there. It wasn't like him. Still worried I called the police and was told yes he is there but they wouldn't tell me anything other than the fact he was acting in a strange manner.

    I begged them to take him to the hospital as that's not like him at all. They wouldn't talk to me about him even though I told them I was his fiancée. His friend had been called and was on his way to see him and so was his father. He was finally taken to the hospital and I waited patiently 40 miles away for any news. I later learned that he had been admitted to the psyche ward because he had a seizure and had been moved to the high dependency ward. I couldn't sleep that night, I was in a panic. The next day I called the hospital and was told that he was now in intensive care. That was it I called a mate to come and get me and discharged myself from the hospital. By his bed side it was hard to keep from crying as he was confused and couldn't speak properly. He had, had a seizure in the house and ended up outside with no clothes on except a sock. He walked into the house next door and surprised some workers and then arrested. I was there every day by his side and he had had more seizures in the hospital and even punched a female doctor in the eye. It turned out he had encephalitis and could have died. He was given acyclovir through a drip and started to get better.

    A couple of weeks later he was allowed to come home. I still keep an eye on him in case it returns. We decided not to wait and began planning our wedding. I was sent to physiotherapy to help me get walking again, I was doing well. I then had a smear test and they found I had abnormal cells so I had to have a biopsy done which came back as CIN not cancer but pre cancer so an operation was scheduled to remove the cells. By now I was very depressed and not coping very well but Tom has always been by my side. For a short while I was able to hobble from one room to another. Our wedding day arrived and nothing went right but I managed to stand as we said our vows. Things were starting to go well again but soon went south yet again.

    My symptoms began getting worse and I was forgetting things and was in pain every day. I was sent to see a psychologist and was told I have M.E. I’ve been trying to learn what I can about it and every symptom I have fits with M.E. I can't handle too much noise and I’ve developed a fear of going out as I get stared at and the world isn't wheelchair friendly like they want you to think it is. I’m back in the wheelchair unable to walk and stand again and sometimes feel like giving up but I won't let this thing beat me. It may have taken away my dream career, job and social life but I still have my husband. Card making keeps me sane at least for a few hours when I have the energy which isn't very often. Some M.E sufferers recover but others have it for life, I guess only time will tell. I just have to learn to cope with this illness and to move on with it and not against it.